Ενδιαφέροντα
Λίγο πριν τα 50 έμαθα να δίνομαι χωρίς να ξοδεύομαι.
Της Λίτσας Φιλίππου.
Λίγο πριν απο τα 50 έμαθα να αγαπώ κάθε μου κύτταρο.
Να ισορροπώ ανάμεσα στα πρέπει και στα θέλω μου χωρίς να ταλαντεύομαι.
Να έχω εμπιστοσύνη στον εαυτό μου χωρίς την επιβεβαίωση κανενός. Να με αποδέχομαι με τα σωστά και τα λάθη μου. Να κάνω τις δικές μου επιλογές χωρίς ξένες παρεμβάσεις. Έμαθα να ονειρεύομαι χωρίς να φοβάμαι. Να ελπίζω χωρίς να δειλιάζω. Να δίνομαι χωρίς να ξοδεύομαι.
Έμαθα πως οι μεγαλύτερες αξίες της ζωής μας είναι κρυμμένες στα πιο μικρά και καθημερινά πράγματα. Οι ομορφότερες στιγμές της μοιράζονται με ανθρώπους που τις αξίζουν. Οι πιο σημαντικές είναι εκείνες που έχουν κάτι απο την ψυχή μας. Και οι ωραιότερες εκείνες που χάραξαν την ύπαρξη μας.
Λίγο πριν τα 50 έμαθα να μετρώ τους ανθρώπους με πράξεις και όχι με λόγια. Να τους υπολογίζω όλους στο τέλος και όχι στην αρχή της γνωριμίας μας. Να τους αποδέχομαι όπως είναι και να μην προσπαθώ να τους αλλάξω. Επιλέγω πλέον ποιοι θα είναι δίπλα μου και ποιοι αξίζουν την αδιαφορία μου. Διαλέγω σε ποιους θα καταθέσω την ψυχή μου και ποιοι θα χαθούν απο την ζωή μου. Δεν έχω πια χρόνο για τα άσχημα αυτού του κόσμου. Αρνούμαι να φθείρω την ύπαρξη μου σε μικρότητες. Δεν στέκομαι πάνω απο λιποψυχίες και συκοφαντίες. Δεν με αγγίζουν οι μικροαστικές συμπεριφορές. Αποφεύγω τις άσκοπες και ανούσιες συναναστροφές.
Δίνω σημασία στην ουσία και όχι στην επιφάνεια. Με αφορά η αξία των ανθρώπων και όχι η εικόνα τους. Μιλάω λίγο και σκέφτομαι περισσότερο. Ακούω χωρίς να κρίνω. Εκφράζομαι χωρίς φόβο. Απολαμβάνω την μοναχικότητα μου. Διασκεδάζω τις λύπες μου. Συνυπάρχω αρμονικά με τους φόβους και τις αδυναμίες μου. Δίνομαι χωρίς όρους. Αγαπάω χωρίς περιορισμούς. Νιώθω χωρίς φραγμούς και όρια. Εμπιστεύομαι χωρίς αμφιβολίες.
Έμαθα πως τα λάθη είναι ανθρώπινες αδυναμίες και η ‘’συγνώμη’’ μεγάλη δύναμη. Πως ο μεγαλύτερος πλούτος σ ‘αυτή τη γη βρίσκεται μέσα μας. Ότι οι πιο πληγωμένοι ανθρώποι είναι αυτοί με το πιο υπέροχο χαμόγελο. Οι πιο αξιοπρεπείς είναι εκείνοι που κρύβουν τα δάκρυα τους στο πιο λαμπερό τους βλέμμα. Και οι πιο ευτυχισμένοι αυτοί που ανακάλυψαν τον εαυτό τους.
Τα μεγαλύτερα μαθήματα τα έχουμε διδαχθεί απο τους ανθρώπους που έχουν περάσει απο την ζωή μας. Τις πιο όμορφες γνώσεις μας τις έχουν δώσει οι εμπειρίες μας. Κάθε πληγή μας είναι και ένα παράσημο σοφίας. Κάθε μας πόνος κι ένα βραβείο ανδρείας και αντοχής. Κάθε νέα μας μέρα ένα Θείο δώρο και μία μεγάλη ευλογία.
Έμαθα, να λέω ΌΧΙ στους άλλους εκεί που πρέπει να λέω ΝΑΙ σε μένα. Να αποχωρώ αξιοπρεπώς απο εκεί που περισσεύω. Να μην επιδέχομαι μειώσεις στο ήθος και στην αξιοπρέπεια μου. Να διατηρώ την ψυχική μου ηρεμία. Να φροντίζω την σωματική μου υγεία. Χρωματίζω τον πίνακα της ζωής μου μέ όμορφα χρώματα που ζεσταίνουν την ύπαρξη μου. Αναγνωρίζω τα όρια μου. Δαμάζω την υπομονή μου. Κρατάω την ψυχραιμία μου. Αναθεωρώ καθημερινά τις απόψεις μου και σέβομαι τις απόψεις των άλλων.
Εκτιμώ την αυθεντικότητα. Δε με γεμίζει η απομίμηση πια. Δεν αναζητώ την επικρότηση. Δεν ψάχνω άλλο για επιβεβαίωση. Δεν με αφορούν οι πρόσκαιρες απολαύσεις. Δεν σεργιανάω άσκοπα στις γειτονιές του κόσμου. Διαβάζω το νόημα πίσω απο τις λέξεις. Κοιτάω πίσω απο τα θλιμμένα βλέματα. Παρατηρώ πίσω απο τα κλειστά παντζούρια. Ακούω πίσω απο φραγμένες σιωπές.
Λίγο πριν τα 50 έμαθα… πως είναι ένα όμορφο και σύντομο ταξίδι η ζωή μας με υπέροχη θέα. Φτάνει να ανοίγεις τα παράθυρα της ψυχής σου και να αντικρύζεις καθημερινά τον κόσμο. Γιατί η ευτυχία είναι στάση ζωής.
- Η ζωή μου είναι δικός μου λογαριασμός. - 10 November 2017
- Να χαμογελάς μωρέ, να λάμπει ο κόσμος σου. - 3 November 2017
- Μην κρίνεις τους ανθρώπους αν δεν ξέρεις σε τι μάχες πολεμάνε. - 27 October 2017
- Eκείνοι οι αδύνατοι-δυνατοί που παραδίδουν μαθήματα ζωής. - 20 October 2017
- Οι γνήσιοι και αυθεντικοί αναζητούν πάντα την αλήθεια. - 13 October 2017
- Μην αφήνεις ρε άνθρωπε τη μιζέρια που σε τρώει να χορτάσει. - 6 October 2017
- Να μη δανείζεσαι ποτέ ξένα φτερά για να πετάξεις. - 29 September 2017
- Μη δειλιάζεις να φύγεις από εκεί που παρακαλάς και συμβιβάζεσαι. - 22 September 2017
- Όσο ζω μαθαίνω… - 15 September 2017
- Εμάς τους δύο θα μας δένει πάντα μια παρ’ ολίγον ευτυχία. - 11 August 2017
Ενδιαφέροντα
Η διαφοροποίηση της μουσικής – η απόλυτη συνταγή επιτυχίας;
Η μουσική είναι παντού. Υπάρχουν λίγες καταστάσεις και στιγμές στην καθημερινότητά μας στις οποίες η μουσική δεν παίζει σημαντικό ρόλο. Είτε αθλείστε, οδηγείτε, περπατάτε ή ψωνίζετε – αν δεν χρησιμοποιούμε τα ακουστικά μας μόνοι μας, η μουσική υπόκρουση παίζει εξωτερικά. Η μουσική είναι ο παλμός κάθε πάρτι, όπου η επιλογή της λίστας αναπαραγωγής μπορεί να δώσει τον τόνο για ολόκληρη την εκδήλωση. Από έξω, η μουσική βιομηχανία μπορεί να φαίνεται διαφορετική, με αστέρια όπως ο Drake, η Lady Gaga ή οι Coldplay να γίνονται πρωτοσέλιδα κάθε μέρα. Και όμως, μια πιο προσεκτική ματιά δείχνει ότι αυτό δεν συνέβαινε πάντα και ότι η ποικιλομορφία στον κόσμο της μουσικής μπόρεσε πραγματικά να καθιερωθεί μόνο τα τελευταία χρόνια. Χάρη στο Spotify and Co., η μουσική είναι πάντα κοντά μας και προσβάσιμη από οπουδήποτε. Γιατί όμως μας αρέσει ακριβώς η ποικιλόμορφη πλευρά της μουσικής και γιατί είναι τόσο σημαντική η διαφοροποίηση;
Η μουσική δεν είναι περιχαρακωμένη
Η μουσική δεν είναι μόνο διασκεδαστική, έχει επίσης πολλά οφέλη και μας βοηθά να αναπτυχθούμε και να αναπτυχθούμε. Η μουσική παίζει ιδιαίτερο ρόλο, ειδικά όσον αφορά τα συναισθήματα και τις διαθέσεις. Μέσα από τη διαφοροποίηση της μουσικής, τελειώνει η περιχαράκωση. Διαφορετικά συναισθήματα και συναισθήματα μπορούν να μεταδοθούν μέσω της μουσικής. Η μουσική είναι φτιαγμένη για όλους και δεν σκέφτεται σε ομάδες. Αλλά ακόμη και αυτή η εξέλιξη συνεχίζεται, επειδή οι παραγωγοί εξακολουθούν να αναφέρουν ότι αποκλείονται από ορισμένους τομείς της μουσικής βιομηχανίας λόγω υποθέσεων με βάση την εθνικότητά τους.
Η μουσική είναι μια παγκόσμια γλώσσα που όλοι μπορούν να καταλάβουν. Συνδέει ηπείρους και ξεπερνά αποστάσεις και πολιτισμούς. Φτάνει στα βάθη των ανθρώπων μοιράζοντας ένα συναίσθημα, μια εμπειρία, μια ιδέα που πυροδοτεί μια εσωτερική κίνηση. Και αυτός ακριβώς είναι ο στόχος, η διαφοροποίηση της μουσικής.
Μουσική που σπάει με τη φόρμα
Μια συνταγή επιτυχίας στον κόσμο της μουσικής είναι να ρισκάρεις τη μουσική. Οι ερμηνευτές και οι καλλιτέχνες που είναι διαφορετικοί φαίνονται όλο και πιο επιτυχημένοι. Όσοι τολμούν να επανεφεύρουν τον εαυτό τους και τον κόσμο της μουσικής γίνονται όλο και πιο δημοφιλείς.
Μια ποικιλόμορφη κοινωνία
Η σημασία της διαφοροποίησης της μουσικής φαίνεται και από την εξέλιξη της κοινωνίας τα τελευταία χρόνια. Θέματα που γίνονται όλο και πιο παρόντα βρίσκονται επίσης όλο και περισσότερο στον κόσμο της μουσικής. Αστέρια όπως η Demi Lovato βγαίνουν ως μη δυαδικά και η Billie Eilish ενσαρκώνει επίσης τα φωτεινά χρώματα της κοινωνίας. Και με επιτυχία: χάρη σε αυτή τη μουσική , οι άνθρωποι αισθάνονται κατανοητοί και με αυτόν τον τρόπο δημιουργείται ένα μέρος όπου ο καθένας μπορεί να είναι όπως θέλει.
Μουσική στο iGaming
Το πόσο διαδεδομένη είναι η μουσική δείχνει το ερώτημα: Πού δεν είναι η μουσική; Σχεδόν κανένας τομέας της ζωής μας δεν μπορεί να φανταστεί κανείς χωρίς μουσική. Ακόμη και στον κόσμο των βίντεο κουλοχέρηδων αμέτρητων βιβλιοθηκών τυχερών παιχνιδιών, η μουσική είναι ένα ουσιαστικό συστατικό. Ενώ υπάρχουν κουλοχέρηδες με θέμα τη μουσική, όπως το Music Stage, σε άλλα παιχνίδια η μουσική είναι ένα σημαντικό υπόβαθρο και παρέχει ενθουσιασμό και επιπλέον αδρεναλίνη. Η μουσική παρέχει επίσης τη σωστή αίσθηση στις ζωντανές στοές.
Χάρη στη μουσική
Έτσι, στο τέλος είναι απαραίτητο μόνο να ευχαριστήσουμε τη μουσική. Για τα συναισθήματα που νιώθουμε χάρη σε εκείνη και τις καταστάσεις που την κάνουν πολύ πιο έντονη. Τι θα ήμασταν χωρίς τη μουσική;
Ενδιαφέροντα
Mανούλες σταματήστε να αυτοθυσιάζεστε για τα παιδάκια σας τα καταστρέφετε.
Στο’ πα και στο ξαναλέω πως κάπου εκεί στις οδηγίες χρήσης ενός τεστ εγκυμοσύνης που αναφέρεται… «Αν εμφανιστούν οι μπλε γραμμούλες.. δηλαδή αν είστε έγκυος.. επισκεφτείτε τον γυναικολόγο σας» θα έπρεπε να υπήρχε υποσημείωση… επισκεφτείτε και τον ψυχολόγο σας!!
Δεν μπορείς να ακούς μα ούτε και να εξηγήσεις πως ο πιο σημαντικός άνθρωπος στην ζωή σου, η ίδια σου η μάνα, που σε ‘φερε στην ζωή, που θυσιάστηκε και θυσιάζεται για να ‘σαι συ καλά, που έκανε στην άκρη όλη της τη ζωή να μπει η δική σου μπροστά, πως εκείνη; πως μπορεί εκείνη να ναι η πηγή της δυστυχία σου. Δεν το χωρά ο νους σου και ούτε να το ακούς δεν θες….
Μα αυτή η αυταπάρνηση της μανούλας σου θα κάνει με τόση μαεστρία την δική σου την ψυχούλα να γεμίζει τύψεις και ενοχές κάθε που θα σηκώσεις κεφάλι από τα πρώτα σου χρόνια… γιατί η μαμά επειδή σε αγαπάει τα κάνει όλα δεν την λυπάσαι; Κάνε αυτό που σου λέει αμέσως… Κοίτα, κοιτά πόσο την ταλαιπωρείς, κοιτά αναίσθητο παιδί που δεν καταλαβαίνεις πως όλα για σένα γίνονται.
Και έτσι εσύ καημένο μου παιδάκι και εγωκεντρικό γίνεσαι και υποτακτικό σε πάσα μορφή εξουσίας. Και στην αγάπη αρχίζεις να αισθάνεσαι υπόχρεος γιατί κάποιος κόβει κάτι από κείνον για να το δώσει σε σένα, δεν υπάρχει εκεί μονό για σένα και αναρωτιέσαι, άραγε την αξίζεις αυτή την αγάπη, άραγε υπάρχει πραγματικά κάτι μονό για μένα;;
Θυσιάζομαι για σένα λέει η μανούλα που πρέπει με το που θα μάθει πως θα σε φέρει στον κόσμο να ψυχαναλυθεί!
Να βρει το νόημα της δικής της ζωής να μην το γυρέψει μέσα από την δική σου την ζωή γιατί αλίμονο σου…
Δεν θα μάθεις ποτέ ποιος πραγματικά είσαι αφού θα μεγαλώνεις με τέτοιο τρόπο ώστε να ικανοποιήσεις αυτό που θα θελε να ναι η ίδια σου η μανούλα, θα σε φτιάξει έτσι ώστε να γίνεις αυτό που ‘θελε εκείνη και θα το δουλέψει πολύ από τότε που θα πας στα πρώτα σου σχολεία και αν εσύ αντισταθείς γιατί κάτι μέσα σου κλωτσήσει και δεν σου κάνει ετούτο το κουστούμι θα ακούσεις πως όλα γίνονται για το καλό σου και πως αυτό πρέπει να γίνει γιατί η μαμά κάνει αγώνα μεγάλο για να σου παρέχει όλα αυτά που εσύ πετάς και λες πως δεν τα θες κακομαθημένο!
Αγενέστατο παιδί και αχάριστο…. που δεν αναγνωρίζεις τίποτα…
Κοίτα με πόση δεξιοτεχνία, πόσο ύπουλα και χωρίς να το καταλάβεις, εσύ είσαι το πρόβλημα, εσύ έχεις τα προβλήματα που δεν καταλαβαίνεις τι είναι όλο αυτό που στήθηκε για σένα χωρίς εσένα;;
Γιατί ποιος είσαι εσύ άλλωστε…. Ποτέ σου δεν θα μάθεις.. Μόνο αν κάποια στιγμή τα καταθλιπτικά συμπτώματα ή το άγχος σε οδηγήσουν στον ψυχαναλυτή!
Και πάλι θα σου πάρει λίγο χρόνο πουλάκι μου μα την στιγμή που θα ανακαλύψεις ποιος είσαι θα ναι σαν σου κόλλησαν δυο φτερά στην πλάτη σαν αυτά που χουν οι άγγελοι και θα σαι ελεύθερος πια να πετάς.. θα είσαι εσύ ο γνήσιος και μοναδικός εαυτός σου και θα μπορείς να πετάς, να ανάπνεες και να απολαμβάνεις !
Την ζωή που σου ανήκει και που εσύ θα δημιουργήσεις.
Μπαρκάτσα Άρια, Ψυχολόγος
Ενδιαφέροντα
Όσα δώσεις στο παιδί σου μέχρι τα 6, καθορίζουν την υπόλοιπη ζωή του!
Έρευνες, μελέτες και σιγά σιγά η εμπειρία των προηγούμενων γενεών πιστοποιούν πια πως τα 6 πρώτα χρόνια ζωής ενός παιδιού προδιαγράφουν το μέλλον του.
Η υγιεινή διατροφή, τα πλούσια ερεθίσματα αλλά κυρίως η αγάπη των γονιών, ειδικά σε αυτά τα σημαντικά 6 χρόνια της ζωής, είναι ικανά ακόμα και να απενεργοποιήσουν τα γονίδια εκείνα που σχετίζονται με κάθε είδους ασθένεια, σωματική ή ψυχική. Τα νέα στοιχεία, κάνουν σκόνη την θεωρία που θέλει τα γονίδιά μας να είναι αυτά που κάνουν καθολικό κουμάντο. Τώρα ξέρουμε πως το περιβάλλον και ο τρόπος που μεγαλώνουμε είναι αυτά που μπορούν να επηρεάσουν τη ζωή μας. Αυτό δεν σημαίνει πως τα γονίδια δεν παίζουν το ρόλο τους, δεν ορίζουν όμως μόνο αυτά τη εξέλιξη της προσωπικότητάς μας.
Όπως και να έχει, το βασικό είναι πως επιβεβαιώνεται αυτό που όλοι υποψιαζόμασταν: πως η προσοχή, η αγάπη και η φροντίδα που δίνουμε σε ένα παιδί από τα πρώτα χρόνια της ζωής του καθορίζει σε τεράστιο βαθμό τη ζωή τους και ουσιαστικά αποτελεί ένα σημαντικό κληροδότημά μας προς εκείνα.
Στα πρώτα χρόνια της ζωής του το παιδί είναι όπως το μαλακό κερί, όπως το μαργαριτάρι, όπως η ζωγραφική, όπως η κατασκευή των αγαλμάτων. Κατ’ επέκτασιν, οι γονείς γίνονται ζωγράφοι, καλλιτέχνες, αγαλματοποιοί και κατασκευάζουν αυριανούς ανθρώπους.
Παλαιότερα τα παιδιά αντιμετωπίζονταν ή αδιάφορα ή στην καλύτερη περίπτωση ως μικρογραφία ενήλικα. Στην πορεία, άρχισε να αντιμετωπίζεται με μεγάλη προσοχή, γιατί το σημερινό παιδί είναι ο πρόδρομος του αυριανού ενήλικα. Το ψυχικά υγιές παιδί έχει πολύ περισσότερες πιθανότητες να είναι αύριο ένας υγιής ενήλικας. Αντίστοιχα, το κακοποιημένο και τραυματισμένο παιδί έχει μεγάλες πιθανότητες να είναι αύριο ένας προβληματικός, αντικοινωνικός και παραβατικός ενήλικας. Η ανατροφή και η διαπαιδαγώγηση του παιδιού από τα πρώτα χρόνια της ζωής του είναι μια υπερβολικά υπεύθυνη, επίπονη, χρονοβόρα και δύσκολη διαδικασία η οποία απαιτεί την ευαισθητοποίηση των γονέων, την αυταπάρνησή τους και την υπομονή τους. Πέρα από το ότι ολοκληρώνει τη μητέρα και τον πατέρα ως άτομα, προδιαγράφει τις σχέσεις των ανθρώπων του αύριο.
Ο πιο εκδηλωτικός τρόπος να μεταδώσουμε την αγάπη μας στο παιδί είναι η σωματική επικοινωνία. Κι όταν λέμε σωματική επικοινωνία, εννοούμε ένα χάιδεμα, ένα αγκάλιασμα, το ενθαρρυντικό χτύπημα στην πλάτη ή και ένα απλό άγγιγμα του παιδιού. Το παιδί που μεγαλώνει σε ένα σπίτι όπου οι γονείς χρησιμοποιούν την οπτική και σωματική επικοινωνία, αισθάνεται άνετα με τον εαυτό του και με τους άλλους, και συνεπώς, θα είναι αγαπητό και θα έχει αυτοσεβασμό. Κατ’ αυτό τον τρόπο το παιδί μπορεί να γεμίσει το συναισθηματικό του δοχείο. Επίσης, η συμμετοχή του πατέρα στη φροντίδα του παιδιού και η συναισθηματική στήριξη στη σύζυγό του ενισχύει σημαντικά τη συζυγική και οικογενειακή αρμονία, ενισχύοντας τους δεσμούς τόσο με το παιδί όσο και με τη σύντροφό του.
“Ιδανικοί” γονείς θεωρούνται, όσοι συνδυάζουν την έκδηλη στοργή και την ενθάρρυνση για αυτονομία. «Το πολύ μικρό παιδί μπορεί να έχει ανάγκη από τη συνεχή φροντίδα, όσο μεγαλώνει όμως, ο γονιός οφείλει να το απελευθερώνει σιγά – σιγά, χωρίς να διακόπτεται η αμοιβαία αγάπη και να το οδηγεί στη συναισθηματική και πνευματική ανεξαρτησία. Η γονεϊκή αγάπη που πνίγει τα παιδιά, τη στιγμή που αυτά έχουν ανάγκη να βγουν εξω από την οικογενειακή “φωλιά”, μοιάζει με τα δέντρα που φυτεύουμε, για να προστατεύσουμε το σπίτι από τον ήλιο και που, τελικά, μεγαλώνουν τόσο πολύ και ευδοκιμούν τόσο, ώστε πρέπει να τα κλαδέψουμε, αν δεν θέλουμε να πεθάνουμε από ασφυξία».
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Γι’ αυτό οφείλουμε σαν γονείς να γεμίσουμε τον κόσμο του τόσο μικρού αυτού ανθρώπου με όμορφες εικόνες και τρυφερά συναισθήματα, ώστε όταν έρθει ο καιρός να «ανασύρει» όλο αυτό του υλικό για να προχωρήσει, να «βρει» στοιχεία που θα τον κάνουν έναν μαχητή της ζωής και όχι ένα φερέφωνο των γονεικών προσδοκιών.
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